So, it is officially the 1st of December. The first day of blogmas and my birthday!! Today I turn 20!!! I have been going on about my birthday forever, I love birthdays! But one thing I wasn’t looking forward to is turning twenty.
I hated the thought of turning twenty, it terrified me. I’m no longer a teenager, being twenty means you’ve got your whole life together, right? Wrong. The more I thought about it, the more turning twenty didn’t bother me. Who cares if I haven’t got my whole life sorted out? After all I am only twenty and I’ve achieved and overcome a lot in my twenty years of life.
I’ve learnt a lot about myself this year, I’m a lot stronger than I thought I was. I’ve been through a hell of a lot but I’ve always came out stronger. Losing my dad is one of the things that shaped me the most, it changed my perspective on everything. I matured a lot at a young age. It also took a while for me to realise the difference between family & relatives and friends & acquaintances. It’s okay to get rid of toxic people, it’s okay to end one sided relationships and its okay to stop wasting your energy on people who don’t deserve it. That’s something I finally learnt this year. I’m so lucky to be surrounded by the people I have around me, I have the best family and friends.
On terms of achievements, there is quite a few things I am proud of. I finished my GCSES with all A*-C grades, I completed my A Levels with A-C grades & I’ve got a foundation diploma in Art & Design. For someone who hated college and made every excuse possible not to go, I am so proud that I achieved what I wanted to achieve. Although I decided against uni and completely changed my mind on my career half way through the course (you can read about that here) I stuck it out and finished it and I am definitely proud of that.
My career was always my number one priority so coming to a dead end and having no idea what I wanted to do really hit me hard. However, I now have the chance to find myself properly and follow my passions. For example digital drawings, I don’t know where I want to go with it, I just know I love doing them. Makeup, I’ve always had a passion for makeup and would absolutely love to do a makeup course but with both things its a case of sucking it up and growing the balls to put myself out there, which I’m still learning to do.
Another thing I’m proud of is my blog. I love having my own little space on the internet where I can ramble about whatever the hell I like. I’ve had some amazing opportunities through my blog, which I never dreamed of getting. I’ve travelled up the country to meet people I’ve never ever met before, that’s something else I’m proud of! Some of the girls I’ve met through blogging are now some of my best friends and I don’t know what I’d do without them.
My health has been up and down a lot this year resulting in me not being able to drive. So I haven’t achieved that goal yet, but I will one day. This also taught me to be spontaneous with things, you never know what is around the corner so just suck it up and do it! You’ll only regret it if you don’t.
I’ve travelled, I’ve been to places I’ve always wanted to go. I’ve been able to buy things I’ve always dreamed of owning, I’ve pushed myself out of my comfort zone, I’ve tried new things, I’ve learnt new techniques, I’ve made new friends and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been! If being 20 is going to be half as good as being 19 was, then bring it on!